


Dancing With Tears In My Eyes

by Janie94



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Established Relationship, Jealousy, M/M, Mentions Of Infidelity, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-12-05 01:27:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,535
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11567442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janie94/pseuds/Janie94
Summary: Marco had been together with Robert for four years now, thinking no one could ever come between them. But he started to have doubts when it became clear that Robert was hiding something from him...





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My dear ash,  
> Once again a very happy birthday to you, I hope you have a lot of fun on your special day.  
> This story is my gift to you and I can only hope that you will like it. But please don't feel any pressure with commenting, after all I know that you are not at home right now. This can wait until you have returned. ;-)

 

**Dancing With Tears In My Eyes**

 

_Marco could still remember the moment he had fallen in love with Robert. It had been a rainy day in November four years ago when the attractive Pole had waited up for him after training. The beautiful thing about Robert was that he didn’t give much about what other people were thinking. Most people would have taken Marco aside first before asking him out, but not Robert._

_No, the striker had come up to him, completely unfazed by Mats, Łukasz and Nuri chatting right beside him as well as Jürgen Klopp as well as half of the coaching staff walking right behind Marco. Robert had smiled at him softly before asking, “Do you have any plans for tonight, Marco?”_

_The blond had frowned in confusion, wondering what Robert could have in mind. “Not yet. Why?”_

“ _Because I would like to ask you if you wanted to go out with me tonight.”_

_Marco had frozen in place, his eyes instantly darting to their coach who had looked at Robert with a raised eyebrow. When Marco looked back at the latter, he saw him meeting Klopp’s gaze challengingly. “Do you have a problem with that, coach?”_

_Klopp had shaken his head with an amused chuckle. “Why would I have a problem with that? And even if I did, you wouldn’t care much about my objections anyway.”_

_Robert had smirked at him with a smug expression before returning his attention to Marco. “You’re damn right about that. So, Marco Reus, tell me. Will you give me a chance to win your heart?”_

_Marco had only been able to nod, followed by a wide smile. The truth was that Robert had already won his heart with his sincerity and his defiance. And Marco would come to love those traits more and more with each day…_

 

The four year old memory made a rueful smile appear on Marco’s face as he scrolled through the online article on his phone, trying to ignore the reporter’s silly babbling and assumptions based on ‘sources say’ – which oftentimes meant that the story had been made up. Instead he focused on the large picture of Robert and Thomas Müller that had been clicked in Munich yesterday. Both men were sitting at the table of a posh restaurant, both of them smiling at each other happily while the waiter was apparently taking their order. That alone wouldn’t have upset Marco, he knew after all that his boyfriend and the always smiling Münchner had become close friends since Robert had joined the FCB. Apparently more so than Marco ever thought possible because what prompted him to wonder whether there was some truth to the reporter’s claims of Thomas and Robert having been on a date together was the single red rose that Thomas was offering to Robert across the table and the restaurant’s name being _L’Amour._

Marco bit his lip, torn between confronting Robert about the matter and dismissing it. It could just be a coincidence or maybe one of them had lost a bet? But there was still that soft smile on Robert’s face; one that only Marco had been able to bring to his boyfriend’s face up to now.

“Earth to Marco,” a very familiar voice called to him and he jerked in surprise when arms came around him from behind and his back was suddenly pulled against a broad chest. “Have you heard anything of what I’ve said that to you in the last two minutes?”

Marco hastily put his phone away and craned his head back, finding Robert’s bright blue eyes looking at him amusedly. “Sorry, I was just thinking.”

His heart ached when Robert started to place little kisses along the side of his throat. “About what?”

“Us” was all Marco could say. He had never been good at lying, especially at Robert who sometimes seemed to know him better than he knew himself. He wanted to ask Robert if there was any truth to the gossips, but if there wasn’t, Robert would surely be disappointed by his lack of trust.

“You’re very tense,” Robert remarked. “What did they do with you in Dortmund?”

Before Marco had a chance to come up with a reply to the playful question, he started nibbling at his boyfriend’s earlobe, obviously drawing a shiver from him on purpose because he knew that this was Marco’s weak spot. The blond let out a gasp and instinctively he tilted his head to the side when Robert’s lips trailed back down to his throat. He was so tempted to just let it go, feeling too tired and worn out after his long drive to Munich, but on the other hand he really wanted to have peace of mind.

“Were you out yesterday? Or did you just sit at home and be your boring self?” he asked, hoping his question sounded joking.

Robert laughed and though it sounded genuine, Marco noticed that he had now tensed up as well and his voice sounded a bit too nonchalant when he replied, “Another wasted day in the boring life of Robert Lewandowski, I’m afraid. I wasn’t in the mood to go out, so I spent the whole evening watching TV and eventually fell asleep there.”

Marco’s heart sank at the lie and before he could have stopped himself, he asked, “Do you feel neglected?”

Robert looked at him surprised. “No. Why would you think that?”

“I don’t know,” Marco replied slowly, trying to come up with a valid reason for the question other than his suspicion. “It's just that we have only seen each other a handful of times in the last few months. Being apart for too long makes it easy to, you know, get distracted.”

Robert chuckled. “Nothing could distract me from you for a longer time. It's true that I miss you very often and I wish we had more time together, but it is what it is. So I cherish each day that I get to be with you.”

Despite his worries, Marco couldn't help a small smile from spreading on his face and he relaxed slightly when Robert picked up his task of covering each inch of Marco's neck with kisses. “You would tell me if there was somebody else in your life, wouldn't you?”

Robert stilled before pulling back again to meet his eyes. “Marco, I love you and only you. No one else will ever be able to take your place.” When Marco opened his mouth to protest, he added in an irritated tone, “But yes, I would tell if I had fallen in love with somebody else. Now can you stop questioning my feelings for you and finally get into bed with me? Otherwise I might rethink the part of distracting myself.”

He grinned teasingly and Marco snorted, relief flooding him at the warm sparkle in his lover's eyes. “Jerk.”

“I love you too, darling,” Robert said before sealing the blond's lips with his own, kissing him with all he got until Marco's worries had faded from his mind.

For now...

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the second chapter of your birthday story, Ash, I hope you will 'like' it.

 

**Chapter 2**

 

Marco had never really liked Sundays.

In the last few years though he had come to actually hate them because he and Robert would always have to part on that day. This one was a particular bad one because they had spent some wonderful days together with Robert being even more affectionate than usual. The handsome Pole preferred to show his love in private and when they were around other people, one had to watch out for the little details to notice his feelings. Like one hand placed protectively at the small of Marco’s back or the intense expression in his eyes whenever Robert looked at him. Subtle things that Marco had learned to pick up. But not these past few days.

No, Robert had been so open in his love that Marco had no idea how to deal with this behavior, except to be ridiculously happy. Saturday night they had visited a club and Robert had barely been able to keep his hands to himself, at least one arm constantly put around Marco’s middle. The blond had been happy about it first, seeing his boyfriend being so unapologetic about their love, but an hour later his joy waned a bit when Manuel and Thomas joined them.

 

_For the fourth time this evening Marco found himself trapped in Robert’s strong arms, the dark-haired striker pulling him against his chest before starting to kiss his way up his neck._

_Marco shot a nervous glance around the crowded room, but no one was paying them much attention. Still he found himself squirming uncomfortably, trying to turn his head back to look at the older man. “Seriously, Robert, what has gotten into you lately? Not that I mind all the affection, but you have never been this needy before.”_

“ _Well, I’m in love and I would like the whole world to know,” Robert replied without stopping his task._

“ _We have been together for four years now,” Marco reminded him though he let his head drop onto Robert’s shoulder, silently surrendering to his lover._

“ _I know. But I woke up the other day and had a moment of realization just how much I love you and how grateful I am to have you in my life.”_

_He sounded completely honest, rapt devotion in his voice and without meaning to Marco found himself thinking of the picture from a few days ago. Perhaps Robert had come to his senses and was feeling guilty? It would definitely explain Robert’s recent behavior. But on the picture Robert and Thomas had both looked so cheerful and happy, so what had happened that had made Robert change his mind?_

_He was torn from his thoughts when he saw two very familiar men coming up towards them, Manuel Neuer using his broad body to make his way through the crowd while a grinning Thomas was following him. Marco could see Thomas’ expression becoming wary when he recognized Marco, but he quickly masked the expression with a teasing smirk before he addressed Robert._

“ _So that’s why you haven’t responded to my calls and messages. I was starting to get worried about you.”_

_Marco had tensed up and he turned to Robert to await his reaction. The Pole was smiling softly, “Just spending some quality time with my boyfriend before he will be gone.”_

_Thomas turned to look at Marco with an amused grin. “I see. I really missed you though. I have become so used to spending time with you lately that it felt weird not seeing you for six days straight. But our appointment tomorrow still stands, doesn’t it?”_

_Marco felt his chest clench at those words, but what actually made his heart sink, was the way Robert’s eyes briefly darted towards him with something akin to panic. When the Pole turned back to Thomas, he sounded pleading. “Sure. The appointment with our medical staff still stands.”_

_There seemed to an unspoken conversation going on between Robert and Thomas as they maintained eye contact and Marco knew his boyfriend well enough to get that Robert was begging Thomas to shut up._

_Manuel however frowned. “The medical staff? But you two already had-“_

_He was silenced by Thomas elbowing him in the ribs. “None of your business, Manu.”_

_Marco had to swallow around the lump forming in his throat, his heart stinging with the feel of betrayal. Robert might be feeling guilty, but he still hadn’t broken off whatever was going on between him and Thomas. So either he was too cowardly to tell Thomas his decision or too selfish to let either Marco or Thomas go._

_Marco had never thought that there would come a day when he would think of Robert Lewandowski as being a coward or selfish._

_Suddenly the arms around him felt wrong and all he wanted was to shake them off, but he squished that feeling down. He didn’t want to make a scene but to confront his boyfriend when they were alone._

“ _So, Marco,” Thomas interrupted his thoughts yet again. “Will you allow me to steal your boyfriend for a few minutes?”_

“ _What?” Marco asked instantly, his mind spinning from Thomas’ brutal honesty._

“ _For a dance of course,” Thomas explained and he looked amused by Marco’s strong reaction._

_The Dortmunder was torn between relief about the clarification and loathing about Thomas taunting him like this. He still couldn’t believe that he had been so wrong not only about his own boyfriend but also about Thomas. Marco would have never thought him capable of having an affair. And that both of them were able to lie to his face about it._

_He forced a cold smile onto his face and pulled at Robert’s hand, making him stumble forward. “Sure, Thomas. Go on, he is all yours.” The younger man didn’t seem to be aware of the ambiguous meaning of Marco’s words because he only smiled warmly at him before taking Robert’s hand._

_The dark-haired Pole however frowned. “You look unhappy, Marco. If you don’t want me to dance with Thomas, you just have to say so, I wouldn’t mind.”_

_His voice and the look in his eyes both were so unbelievably honest that Marco really wanted to believe him. He wanted to believe that there was nothing going on between his boyfriend and Thomas. He shoved that sentiment away._

“ _Don’t worry about me, Robert,” Marco responded and he was surprised how nonchalant he managed to sound. “I’m sure Thomas would never forgive me if I denied him that.”_

_Robert chuckled, then he leaned forward and placed a quick kiss onto Marco’s lips before allowing Thomas to lead him onto the dance floor. It was a cheesy ballad and Marco had to swallow down his jealousy when he saw how close the two of them were, Robert’s arms linked behind Thomas’ neck while the latter’s hands were grabbing his hips._

_Both of them were grinning while they moved to the rhythm of the music and when Robert even made a graceful turn before Thomas pulled him close again, they both burst out laughing._

_Marco hadn’t been aware of the way he was glaring daggers at Thomas until Manuel said, “Since when do you dislike Thomas?”_

“ _I don’t have any problem with him,” Marco hurried to reply, but the goalkeeper raised an eyebrow challengingly._

“ _Then care to tell me why you are jealous of him dancing with Robert?” When Marco didn’t respond, he added, “I know this is none of my business, but let me give you an advice. In the past few months Thomas has become one of Robert’s closest friends. Please don’t ruin that with your jealousy.”_

_Marco turned towards him, unable to keep his voice neutral any longer. “I’m not the one who is ruining something.”_

_He didn’t wait for Manuel’s reply, but made his way through the crowd as well, his eyes fixed on his boyfriend who was now more or less hugging Thomas in the middle of the dance floor, the couple merely shifting their weight from one side to the other to the soft tunes of the love song which the DJ was playing now._

_Robert had his back to Marco, but Thomas was able to see him approaching and his smile widened._

“ _Enjoying yourself?” Marco asked sarcastically._

_Thomas tilted his head to the side in a curious manner, the hostile tone clearly puzzling him. Then realization seemed to hit him because his smile disappeared and his eyes narrowed challengingly. “Robert, would you mind if I danced with you boyfriend?”_

_Robert looked as dumbstruck as Marco felt. “No.” He gave Marco a questioning look before stepping out of Thomas’ arms. Marco was at a loss of words when Thomas pulled him close and led him to the side, out of Robert’s earshot. There he pressed himself closely against Marco’s front and whispered into his ear._

“ _You’re a very lucky man, Marco Reus, I hope you know that. Robert is a wonderful man and he deserves nothing but the best of you, do you hear me? If you ever hurt him, I will never forgive you for that.”_

“ _Careful,” Marco responded. “You sound like a jilted lover now.”_

_Thomas chuckled before pulling back slightly so he could look at Marco’s face. “Well, he ditched me for you in the last week, so I’m a bit miffed with you right now. I miss having Robert all to myself.”_

_Marco tensed again, taken aback by Thomas not hiding his desire any longer. “Do you think this is a joke, Müller? Because it isn’t for me! Robert belongs to me and I won’t allow anyone to take him away from me.”_

_Thomas’ grin turned into a soft smile. “I know that, Marco. And I also know that Robert could never love anybody as much as he loves you. Believe me, I of all people would know.”_

_Marco had expected a fight, therefore Thomas’ surrender threw him off a bit. “Why would you know the extent of Robert’s feelings for me?”_

_A strange glint appeared in Thomas’ eyes. “Robert and I have gotten very close over the last few weeks. There are not many things that he keeps from me, especially when it comes to you.”_

_Marco was torn between jealousy and relief. Apparently Robert had finally made his choice. Marco loved Robert enough to forgive him for that betrayal as long it was over now. That didn’t apply to Thomas though. Marco didn’t trust him not to try winning Robert’s over._

_He grabbed Thomas’ hand and whirled him around until the younger man was trapped, his back pressed tightly against Marco’s front. “I want you to stay away from my boyfriend.”_

_He could feel Thomas tensing up in his arm, the pained groan as the Münchner tried to turn around giving him a sense of grim satisfaction. “You can’t tell Robert who he should spend his time with. He needs his friends.”_

“ _He doesn’t need_ you _of all people!” Marco retorted angrily. “Did you think I wouldn’t notice? That Robert turns to you the minute I walk out of the door.”_

_This time Thomas managed to free himself, turning back to Marco with narrowed eyes. “Jealousy doesn’t suit you, Marco Reus.”_

_Marco let out a furious snarl and he shoved the surprised Thomas against the wall, not caring at all about the gasps and worried looks he received from the people around them. “Why do you want to meet up with Robert tomorrow?”_

_Thomas’ smile vanished instantly and was replaced by a wary expression. “I told you. It’s an appointment with our medical staff.”_

“ _Don’t try to bullshit me, Müller!”_

_He could see Robert and Manuel making their way towards him, both of them looking confused and shocked by what was going on._

“ _What’s wrong, guys?” Manuel asked, looking from one to the other._

_Both Marco and Thomas payed him no mind at all, instead they continued to stare at each other for a moment longer, then Thomas sighed heavily, turning to Robert with a regretful expression. “I think we should cancel our date tomorrow. I’m sure the doctors already have everything they need.” He said the last part with a mocking undertone that was clearly meant as a jab to Marco. “Manu, I think it’s better that we leave now.”_

_The goalkeeper gave Marco a questioning look, but the Dortmunder wasn’t in the mood to respond and instead he stayed focused on Thomas who was about to leave, but stopped beside Robert, his expression becoming warmer when he looked at the Pole. “You should tell him soon. I’m tired of dancing around the truth to cover for you.”_

_The reminder made Marco’s stomach clench, but he forced himself to stay silent. Robert swallowed hard before nodding. “Yes, I know. I’m really sorry, Thomas. I should have never dragged you into this.”_

_Thomas shook his head, cupping Robert’s face between his palms to make him meet his eyes. “You misunderstand me, Lewy. I didn’t say this to make you feel guilty. You didn’t force me to do anything I don’t want, this was my decision as well. All I want to say is that it won’t get any easier with time. Just tell Marco.”_

_With one last, encouraging smile towards Robert, Thomas turned away to leave the club, Manuel following him after a moment of hesitation._

_Robert didn’t move at first, eying Marco carefully. “What did Thomas tell you about tomorrow?”_

“ _Nothing, that’s the point,” Marco replied. “What is going on between the two of you, Robert?”_

_His lover finally stepped closer, an anxious smile appearing on his face. “I will tell you, I promise. Just not now, okay? I need some more time.”_

_So Robert wasn’t as sure about his feelings as Thomas had claimed. A sudden coldness enclosed Marco’s heart like an icy claw, his voice so sharp that it could have cut glass. “I have never taken you for a coward.”_

_He could see that his words were cutting deep, a pained expression appearing on Robert’s face. “I’m always afraid where you are concerned, Marco. That’s why you have always been the one who needed to take our relationship one step further. Kissing me for the_ _very_ _first time, making love to me in your bed,_ _making out with me in our locker room right in front of our teammates_ _. It was always you initiating those things because I was too scared to take what I wanted.”_

_A melancholic smile appeared on Marco’s face at the memories. “You’re right. I have always been better at taking. But you have always been better at giving. What I expressed through actions, you did with words. Remember that you were the one asking me out in front of our coach and teammates? Or that you were the one telling me that you loved me and wanted to be with me for the rest of our lives? That you were the one embracing me and saying goodbye when you left the BVB even though I refused to say even one word with you? That’s why I loved you, Robert. Because you have always needed only few words to lay the whole world to my feet. Whatever happened to that Robert?”_

_He didn't wait for a reply but walked away then, unable to look at Robert's eyes and see the guilt and pain in them. They barely spoke on their way back home and even though Marco could Robert's warm body right beside his own during the whole night, he had never felt so alone._

Marco had never been more glad for Sunday to come.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking so long with the final chapter of this story, but I haven't been in the country and even then writing is coming rather hard to me lately. For those of you who are reading this story, I hope that you will like the conclusion of this story or that it will be readable at least.

 

**Chapter 3**

 

Marco had expected Sunday to be a quiet affair. He knew his words from the evening before had hurt Robert deeply and the striker had the habit of bottling up all pain and heartache, not speaking of it until Marco would confront him. But not this time.

When Marco woke up in the morning, the bed felt colder than usual and when he turned around, he saw that Robert wasn’t lying beside him. Marco felt a brief pang of fear that his lover had done what Marco had feared ever since he saw the picture; that he had finally left him for Thomas, but then he remembered that this was Robert’s house and if anyone had to leave for good, it would have to be Marco. He mentally chided himself for jumping to conclusions and got up from the bed instead to search for his boyfriend.

He didn’t have to walk very far though because he could soon pick up on the smell of scrambled eggs and freshly boiled coffee that lead him into the kitchen. Marco felt relief almost crush him at the sight of Robert sitting at the table, his legs drawn up to his chest and his chin resting on them, eyes staring into the distance while he was stirring his cup of coffee absentmindedly. Marco stood in the doorway watching him for a few seconds, his chest constricting with pain at seeing the melancholy in his boyfriend’s face before eventually making his presence known.

“Good morning,” he said, a little smile spreading on his face when Robert turned to him with a downcast expression.

“Morning, darling,” Robert replied after a moment of hesitation and he looked wary as though he expected Marco to start shouting right there and then.

Marco walked over to him and sat down on the chair beside him. “You only surprise me with such a breakfast when you have a bad conscious.”

“Well, you were very upset last night and I figured this would cheer you up a bit. And you could eat while I try to explain myself.”

Marco tensed instinctively. So this was it, the moment of truth. Suddenly he wished he could stall that talk just a little bit longer, not just because he feared that Robert might choose Thomas or break up with both of them to have some time to think. No, the selfish part of him already dreaded finding out the truth and having to deal with it. How was he supposed to make love to Robert in their bed, knowing that Robert had been whispering Thomas’ name there only a few days or weeks prior? How was he supposed to look into Thomas’ eyes, knowing the latter still desired Robert? And worst of it all, how was he supposed to believe Robert telling him how much he loved him and  _only_ him when he had allowed Thomas to come between them?

He still nodded though, reaching out to put some eggs onto his plate despite his stomach feeling like revolting from his anxiousness. “Alright, explain then.”

Robert took a deep breath before meeting Marco’s gaze again. “You are right with what you accused me of yesterday. I was never good with proofing my love through actions, it was always you who showed me the right direction. And I’m very grateful to you for doing that. You showed me how to love.” He leaned forward, his hand reaching for Marco’s as though he needed something to hold on to. “But I realized that we can’t go on like this. That’s why I’m asking you, please let me do the right thing for once.” He tightened his grip, a sad smile appearing on his face. “Marco, I know you love me more than I probably deserve. It hasn’t always been easy with me, I have this habit of secluding myself from time to time, especially when I’m alone here in Munich. It’s hard to get through to me then because I tend to push people away rather than let anybody else in.”

Marco swallowed as he got what Robert was getting at. “Until Thomas happened.”

Robert’s expression became softer. “Yes. He had to force me to hang out with him at first and he didn’t care how I kept screaming and shouting at him to leave me alone. I thought he just liked pestering me, but later I realized that he truly cared about me. He tried to protect me from myself. And after a while I was just too tired of fighting him any longer and started spending time with him.”

“And you became very close,” Marco concluded in a hollow voice.

“Yes,” Robert agreed softly. “You know I have had a lot of low points in the past few months. More than usual I mean.”

Marco nodded. Part of the reason why he felt so guilty for not having been able to visit Robert very often in the last year, was because Robert would have needed him. His boyfriend had been suffering from depression for as long as Marco knew him, but it had never been as severe as last year. Robert had only told him about it when he had already been at the rock bottom and Marco had come to Munich to spend the following three weeks with him. But it was times like these that Marco hated their long distance relationship and the obstacles that came with it. That he couldn’t always be there for Robert.

“So you told Thomas about your depression?”

“I didn’t have to,” Robert responded regretfully. “I had a fit of rage one day after training. I kept screaming because of stupid things for hours and Thomas came to visit me at home later in the evening. I kept shouting at him to go away and leave me the fuck alone, but you know Thomas, he can be very insistent.” Despite the fear nagging at his heart Marco had to chuckle. Oh yes, he could imagine that! 

Robert looked at him pleadingly. “It has become a little bit better since. It helps having someone to talk to. And that’s why I’m asking you not to be jealous of him. Please Marco, he has become one of my closest friends and I don’t want to let him go.” 

Marco knew he wouldn’t be able to argue with Robert about this. All he wanted was for his boyfriend to be happy, even if that included Thomas. “You’re making it sound like there is nothing but friendship between the two of you. But you know that’s not true.”

Robert tensed up immediately, a resigned look entering his eyes. “Yes, there is more. I guess it’s hard to miss, isn’t it?”

The admission hurt more than it should have, after all Marco had expected this answer. “But how did this happen?”

Robert shrugged his shoulders, but he looked dejected. “How do people fall in love? I don’t know when exactly it happened. And Thomas didn’t tell me at first, I had to figure it out on my own. When I eventually did and confronted him about it, Thomas kissed me. I think he was even more confused and scared of his feelings than I was. He avoided me for two weeks straight and that’s when I first realized how much I needed him in my life.”

Marco swallowed hard, his throat constricting with the fear of what was about to come, the decision Robert was about to make. “And now?”

“I don’t want to hurt you, Marco,” Robert replied and the conviction in his voice broke the blond’s heart. “I know you’re jealous of Thomas, you made that perfectly clear last night. But let me tell you this, nothing that is going to happen between him and me could change my love for you. Quite the contrary actually. He has made me realize just how deep my feelings for you are and that I need to show them to you more openly because you deserve it. Because I don’t want to lose you, Marco.”

Marco was quiet for a long moment, letting the confession sink in. He could hear, see and feel Robert’s love, but he couldn’t trust it – not completely. Not as long as Thomas was a threat to him.

“If I asked you to stop seeing Thomas, would you do it?”

Robert bit his lip, a pleading look entering his eyes. “No, don’t do that, Marco. Don’t become the kind of man who wants to control his boyfriend’s life. I know what you are afraid of, Marco. Of what is going to happen once you leave again. But you need to trust me when I say that I’m not going to do anything that would hurt you.” He reached out, stroking Marco’s cheek with the back of his hand affectionately. “I’m done with hurting you, Marco. There has been enough of that and I’m so sorry about this, I swear it was never my intention.”

Marco let out a sigh of relief, throwing himself into Robert’s arms and hugging him tightly. He had not really expected Robert to choose him, not with so much conviction. “Thank you, Robert.” He couldn’t say more, hoping that his lover would understand how much this meant to him.

“I didn’t know that Thomas was upsetting you this much,” Robert admitted once he had pulled back to look at him.

“Of course he was. How could it not upset me to see the two of you together when you are the one I love?” Marco responded, the memory of seeing that picture still haunting him even though his relief at this being in the past now overshadowed it.

“There is no reason for you to be jealous of Thomas,” Robert assured him with a soft smile. “He could never take your place in my heart.”

Marco nodded, a smile spreading on his face as he tightened his hold around Robert. He still felt a sting at the thought of his boyfriend and Thomas together, at what had transpired between them God knows how often. But for now it was overshadowed by relief. He had been so afraid of losing the man he loved that this was a price he would gladly pay. 

All that mattered was that this affair was over now.

 

***

 

Marco had never really liked Sundays.

And despite this mess of a week he had with Robert, this one was no different. Usually Marco would leave in the early afternoon to arrive back in Dortmund before it was dark outside but not this time. Neither he nor Robert were able to say goodbye so soon and instead they had spent a wonderful day together in Munich by the time Marco was throwing his bag into his car.

“Do I really have to leave?” he asked pleadingly only for Robert to laugh softly. “Afraid so. How would you expect me to explain your absence to your teammates?” Despite his chiding words Robert had linked his arms behind Marco’s back and leaned forward to kiss him softly.

Marco sighed as he melted into the touch. “You only make it harder for me to leave.”

Robert pulled back with a grin. “Yes, I know. I’m just making sure that you will be coming back as soon as possible.” He dragged his lips across the Dortmunder’s jawbone, his hands shifting to the latter’s hips which sent an excited tingling through Marco’s body.

“You’re doing a damn good job at that,” he muttered under his breath before finally finding the strength to push his boyfriend back. “But I really have to leave now.”

Robert dropped his hands, his eyes watching Marco as he got into the driver’s seat. Just before he closed the door after the blond though, a troubled expression appeared on his face and he swallowed anxiously before asking, “Will you go out with me next Saturday?”

“Next Saturday?” Marco repeated dumbfounded. “Robert, you know I can’t come to Munich every weekend even if I want to. It’s a long drive from Dortmund and I’m supposed to give my body a rest every now and then.”

“I know, but please just this once,” Robert pleaded him and there was an unsettling urgency in his words. “There is something important that I need to tell you. Something I should have told you a lot sooner but I was too much of a coward to do that.”

Marco stilled and looked up at Robert warily. “Why don’t you tell me now?”

“If I do that, you might slam that door in my face and drive home without another word. I’d prefer to make some preparations first and then break it to you gently.”

Marco’s fear from this morning returned full-force, but he tried his best to stomp it down. This didn’t have to be about their relationship or Thomas. It could also mean that Robert was planning to transfer to another club this summer, perhaps abroad which would mean they would barely get to see each other anymore and that was the reason why he was so afraid of Marco’s reaction. The younger man would have never thought that there would ever come a day when he would be relieved to hear such news.

“Fine,” was all Marco could say around the lump in his throat and he was just about to close the door of his car when Robert leaned down to kiss him again. Only then did the Pole step back and allow him to leave.

Marco had only driven for half an hour before he realized that he had been so occupied with his boyfriend that he had forgotten his wallet back home. He groaned annoyed before turning the car around and driving back to where he had come from. He had to grin when he thought of the face Robert was most likely going to make when he saw Marco coming back. Shaking his head at his own obliviousness, he parked the car in the driveway and pulled out his keys to let himself in. As expected he found his wallet lying on the kitchen counter, the place where Robert had assaulted him with kisses. He had also expected to find said man in the kitchen now, after all it was time for dinner now, but to his confusion he could hear Robert’s voice from the bedroom.

“I’m really sorry for being so late. But Marco only left just now and I didn’t want to make him leave earlier.”

Marco froze when he realized that Robert wasn’t talking to him. He had most likely not noticed yet that Marco had come back. Was he talking to somebody on the phone? However there was a second voice coming from the bedroom that confirmed Marco’s worst fears.

“I wasn’t complaining,” a very cheerful Thomas Müller responded. “Now stop apologizing and get a move on.”

There was the sound of rustling, followed by an indignant shriek of Robert. “Hey, keep your paws off me! I’m perfectly capable of undressing myself.”

Marco bit his lip hard, forcing himself not to barge into the room and lunge for Thomas even though everything in him was yearning for it. 

Robert had lied to him. Marco wasn’t even gone for an hour and Robert was already hopping into bed with another man. He felt tears burning in his eyes and tried hard to get his breathing back under control and keep quiet. Slowly he turned around and tiptoed into the direction of the front door, but not fast enough to miss Thomas’ response. “Apparently not. Every time I take you out for dinner, you take ages for changing.”

“I already told you that Marco was here,” Robert repeated with audible impatience.

Thomas groaned. “Please, Lewy, can we not talk about Marco for once? You’re ruining my mood by reminding me that you already have a boyfriend.”

Marco was glad that he wasn’t able to hear Robert’s response. He had already heard enough. He could feel the first tear falling when he quietly shut the door behind himself.

 

***

 

The following week was an absolute nightmare. Marco hadn’t confronted Robert about the scene he had witnessed before returning to Dortmund. He was hurt and angry with Robert for lying to him and betraying him, but he kept quiet about the matter for now. Next weekend he would see Robert again and then they would have to talk again. And this time he would give Robert an ultimatum.

It was either staying faithful to Marco or leaving him for Thomas, no in between. Marco’s teammates had of course noticed that there was something weighing heavy on his heart and they had become worried about him, but he didn’t tell them the truth. He couldn’t do that because they would only blame Robert. And despite his disappointment with his boyfriend, Marco still believed that there had to be a valid reason for the striker’s behavior. It was ridiculous because no reason could ever justify infidelity, but he just couldn’t help himself.

Robert had always been the strongest and most loyal person he had ever known and a part of Marco refused to believe that he had been wrong about the man he loved. So he forced himself to keep going even though he dreaded Saturday, when he would see Robert again.

The week seemed to pass by torturously slow and by the time he stopped the engine in front of Robert’s house in Munich, he felt like throwing up. He remained sitting for a moment, realizing that this might be the very last time he would walk through the door as Robert’s boyfriend. He had managed to collect himself by the time Robert exited the house and was walking towards him with a warm smile on his face, but in the two hours they had until they would go out together like he had promised Robert previously, the latter asked him several times if he was alright, clearly sensing that something was bothering the Dortmunder.

Robert had chosen the restaurant  _L’Amour_ for their date and Marco was painfully reminded of the picture that started this whole mess. But he didn’t protest and let Robert lead him towards a secluded table in the back even though the whole restaurant was empty. The vase with red roses on that table only added to Marco’s bad mood and he failed to shove away the image of Thomas presenting such a rose to Robert.

After Robert had ordered champagne for them, he tilted his head to the side. “Will you tell me now what has been bothering you, Marco? You didn’t respond to most of my messages for the entire week and you have barely said a word to me since you arrived.”

Marco took a deep breath to steel himself before he finally met Robert’s gaze and start speaking. “So you really want to know why I’m upset? Well, it’s about Thomas.”

Robert frowned. “I thought we had already talked this through?”

“Exactly!” Marco responded and as though a wall had been broken, he was flooded with anger. “I thought the same. I trusted you when you said you wouldn’t let him come between us and what do you do? Hop into bed with him before I have even left the city!”

Robert’s eyes widened. “Wait, you came back last Sunday?”

“Yes, I had forgot something,” Marco replied. “I could hear you and Thomas in our bedroom, so don’t bother lying to me again. Just tell me, Robert, was he worth it?” Robert’s face hardened, a cold expression entering in his eyes that Marco hadn’t seen in a long time. But he still remembered it well enough to know that the striker was boiling underneath the surface.

“You really think I slept with Thomas?”

“What else am I supposed to think when he is asking you to undress faster?!” Marco retorted and he hated that his voice was trembling so badly and was evidence of how much this was getting to him.

He didn’t know what to make off the relief and even slight amusement in Robert’s expression, but could only narrow his eyes as he watched his boyfriend stand up and round the table before crouching down beside him. “Hold on for a second, darling, I think I have heard enough.” A little smile appeared on his face and his eyes softened when he started to explain, “Let me get one thing straight. I have never slept with Thomas. Not last Sunday and never before.”

“Stop lying!” Marco couldn’t help but shout, hating how the damn spark of hope was back in his heart.

“Will you please let me explain before you go on with your accusations?” Robert asked with a hint of annoyance and only after Marco had agreed with a clip nod, did he continue.

“The reason why Thomas was at my house and asking me to undress was because I was late for our appointment. He had agreed to go to a dancing course with me because as you know, I suck at couple dance.”

“That’s such a relief,” Marco cut in sarcastically. “Much more romantic than just asking him over for sex of course.”

Robert closed his eyes. “Marco Reus, please in your own interest don‘t interrupt me until I’m done explaining.” When the blond didn’t protest further, he tried again. “I had asked him for help because as you know best, I’m a perfectionist when it comes to important moments and I didn’t want to embarrass myself when I would ask you for a dance tonight.”

The unexpected change of topic threw Marco off completely. “Now? Are you serious?”

Instead of answering Robert extended his hand in a silent invitation, a sincere look in his eyes. After a moment Marco gave in, knowing that he would have to accept if he wanted Robert to go on with his explanation. He allowed the older man to pull him into the middle of the room and as though the band had only waited for that cue, they changed the song to a slow ballad. Robert turned around and smiled at Marco warmly before placing his hand at the small of Marco's back and starting to move. 

For several minutes neither of them spoke and despite his fears Marco lost himself in the dance, trying to keep up with Robert who became more confident soon, twirling Marco around once as soon as the song picked up speed and power. The song eventually came to an end though and was followed by a love song that allowed them to catch their breath while they were swaying back and forth.

Marco's anger had faded for now, but he had become curious now. “What's going on, Robert? You don't expect me to believe that all this trouble was just because of your wish to dance with me? You could have asked me to accompany you to the course and still surprise me with dinner. And why were you here in this restaurant with Thomas nine days ago?”

Robert tensed at the last part. “How do you know about that? Did Thomas tell you?”

“He didn't have to. I saw a picture of you two in the newspapers. I wouldn't have believed those stupid reporters if the rose Thomas was handing to you hadn't made it clear why you two were going out together.”

Robert froze in his movement, bringing their dance to an awkward end while the confusion on his face was making way to disbelief. “Wait, so the reason you have been behaving so strange lately is that photo? Because you thought I was betraying you with Thomas?” When Marco only nodded again, he stepped closer, both of his hands gripping Marco's arms tightly. “I could never do that to you. I know that Thomas loves me and I could understand if him kissing me made you feel jealous, even more so because I didn't tell you about it right away. But he is nothing more than a very dear friend to me. I didn't go out with Thomas on the day the photo was taken, not really. Rather I asked him for his help.”

“What kind of help?” Marco asked irritated.

Robert bit his lip and suddenly the look in his eyes was so intense that Marco would have felt strangely exposed if he didn't know Robert that well. “I wanted this to be perfect, but apparently I managed to ruin it completely instead.”

Marco swallowed hard. “Ruined what?”

The corner of Robert's mouth twitched upwards into a fond smile and he let go of Marco's arms, entwining the fingers of one of the latter's hands with his own. “Marco, we have been together for four years now and each day that I got to spend with you, I only loved you more. You have been my strength whenever I was too weak to handle the downs of life and you tried your very best to be there for me whenever I needed you. I know that it hasn't always been easy and that I'm far from perfect, but I'm trying every single day to be worthy of your love. In the past few months I have come to realize that you are the only one I will ever love, that my heart will forever belong to you. And that's why I have to ask you today.” Marco was too taken aback and shocked by the confession to respond right away and he could only watch as Robert took a deep breath before reaching into the pocket of his jacket with his free hand and going down onto his right knee in front of him. “Will you marry me, Marco Reus?”

Marco was completely overwhelmed, too many emotions threatening to crush his fragile heart. He could barely believe what he had just heard; not because he didn’t believe Robert but because he had not expected this, not now, not at all. He had been convinced that Robert would leave him for Thomas and instead all of this mess had been because Robert wanted to propose to him properly?!

Marco chuckled at the irony of it all though it sounded more like a sob. “Robert Lewandowski, I absolutely hate you right now!”

His handsome boyfriend paled. “Is that a no?”

Marco shook his head before reaching down to cup Robert’s face between his palms. “I thought you didn’t love me anymore and now this. Of course it’s a yes, you idiot!”

The last thing he saw was the breathtaking smile on Robert’s face before their lips met in a passionate kiss. Marco could sense Robert’s overwhelming love and gratitude in his kiss and he tried to keep up with him until Robert parted his lips for him, allowing Marco to claim what had been his all along.

“I love you, Lewy,” the blond whispered as soon as he had pulled back to breathe. “I love you so much. And I’m sorry for being such a fool. I should have never accused you of cheating on me, you never gave me any reason to think so.”

But there was no sign of reproach in the older one’s eyes. It shouldn’t surprise Marco; Robert had always been the more forgiving one of them. “It’s fine, Marco. I should have explained myself a lot sooner, I know that, but I just wanted everything to be perfect. I was convinced you would panic if I just blurted out that I wanted to marry you. You always needed time to come to terms with changes, especially regarding our relationship.”

Marco knew that as well but he had never realized that Robert had interpreted his behavior the wrong way. “Robert, the sole reason for that was because I was angry with myself. You made it look so easy to show your love to me, no matter if we were alone or around other people. And me, I could barely say ‘I love you’ out loud in public.”  
Robert’s smile softened. “I have never cared about that. I know in my heart how much you love me, so I have never expected you to act on it in. And I never will.”

“But I do,” Marco argued before closing the distance between them once again, pressing his lips against Robert’s in a more tender kiss than their earlier one.

After a moment Robert started to move again and when Marco pulled back, he lay his head onto his lover’s shoulder while they were both dancing with tears in their eyes…

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Dancin' Your Memory Away](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11858961) by [Blue_Night](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night/pseuds/Blue_Night)
  * [Zeig mir wie du tanzt](https://archiveofourown.org/works/11959227) by [eafay70](https://archiveofourown.org/users/eafay70/pseuds/eafay70)




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